Tuesday, April 15, 2008

#3 Campaign Season

Anyone who has known me for awhile has probably heard me say it:

"The only thing I hate more than politics...is politicians."

Campaign season is terrible and this year's presidential primary campaign seems to be the worst. All the pandering to would-be voters...the lies...the flip-flopping...the mudslinging. And the ads...oh, the ads. I'm so sick of hearing about who's going to take the 3am call. Ugh. It's enough to make you scream. Go ahead...let out a little scream right now...it's okay.

I'm going to pick on all three candidates, so I make sure I offend everyone. :-)

So...here we go. Sorry, but when I see Hillary Clinton hanging out at the bar throwing back shots with "the locals", I just have to laugh. When else would you see Hillary at your local bar? Puhleez! But come campaign season, she's rubbing elbows with us "common folk", telling us how she understands our hardships. This from the woman who, along with her husband, has made $109 million in the past four years. Yeah...she gets me.

And Barack Obama could not have looked more out of place at the local bowling alley. He's throwing gutterballs and slamming watered-down beer with chili cheese fries like it's a regular Saturday night for him. How much you wanna bet he was barfing like a supermodel as soon as the cameras left? Ha! But kudos for not wearing the bowling shirt for the local bowling league championship team. How is it he can make those bowling shoes look good?

And then comes John "I'm not George Bush but I'm just like George Bush" McCain...who many have nicknamed the "pander bear" because of his incessant trait of "becoming just like whomever he is around." The chameleon candidate. Oh, and did you see him on Idol Gives Back? He got in a little jab at Simon, so he gets kudos there. But you could tell the man has never watched an episode of American Idol in his life.

So why? Why do politicians who desperately want us to vote for them spend months of pretending to be someone they're not? Are voters so stupid that they buy into the "he/she's just like one of us" routine?

Let's be honest. Seriously. How about a politician who comes out and says it like it is?

"Hey, I don't know what life's like for you. I'm rich. When I want
a drink, I pour myself a shot of 100 year old Scotch that I keep in the
wetbar in my house...not the pub down the street. I don't bowl.
I don't watch the popular tv shows. I didn't even know that
there was such a thing as chili cheese fries. I wear $1000 suits.
But, I do know a thing or two about running a successful organization.
And I can see areas of improvement for this country that I believe I can offer."

Would that be too much to ask? Apparently so.

Campaign season...You Suck.



Er, maybe they're doing it because if they were themselves we'd hate them even more for being high and mighty posh people who'd never even seen a single piece of financial deprivation or been in a REAL bar without quivering and leaving with the bodyguards seconds later. At least watching them pretending can be quite funny (okay, here we had Tony Blair and Gordon Brown making idiots of themselves by buying ice cream - a simple task, made really hard. They didn't even eat it lol)
Love the blog - I can think of lots of things that really suck but you probably don't want me to go on for hours. I'll be back


Monique said...

"barfing like a supermodel as soon as the cameras left" - literally L'd MAO. Little B came running in to see what was going on, even left his Spiderman Stunt Set to do so, which is pretty darn major for a (almost) 3 year old!

Yep, hate 'em. I like your spiel though, are you running ?

If it weren't the presidency, like something that has to be taken seriously, I would suggest we all write in T. Barry Brazelton on the ballots. I love that man...

Monique said...

Oh, and my addition to Things That Suck... Having the oven door try to close on your arms, no it did close on my arms while I was taking a heavy chicken out last night.

Burns on both forearms --- SUCK !!

Hoover Maneuver said...


Yes, you're right...it's for sure good for a laugh!

And yes, I'm sure we'd hate them even more if we knew exactly how elitish they really are.

I'd love to see a video clip of Blair and Brown trying to buy ice cream...I'm sure it's hilarious.

Thanks for reading...and for commenting! Hope to see you back soon!

Hoover Maneuver said...


Nope...not running! :-) Ugh...I can't think of many careers I would loathe more. I guess it takes a special kinda person to do it. Think about all the crap they have to go through--publicly--and then the hoops they jump through to get elected. No thank you!

Sorry to hear about your burns...ouch! I hate it when that happens!

Thanks for coming back!


I'm already back lol - and after seeing what I'd written this morning, I decided that...
Especially film critics. Very rare is it that they get it right on the films I like.
Ok, ciao!


Hoover Maneuver said...


Isn't that the truth! When I started writing today's post, I thought, "I should include something in there about polls..."
but then I thought, no I'll wait and include that the "Pundits/Polls Suck."

Now, I'm thinking I'll just call it "experts suck" and include polls, pundits and movie critics!

Thanks for the idea!

jglenn said...

Is it just me or does George W. look a little nervous about the type of hug McCain is giving him? LOL

Hoover Maneuver said...


Yeah, I was hoping there was a way to put captions on photos when you upload them...cuz I was definitely going to say something about that pic! Ha!

Thanks for reading...and for commenting.